Time for a life change
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"Shawn Armstrong" sx...@NOSPAMMERalaska.edu
So, I found out a couple weeks ago that my wife has been screwing around with my boss behind my back, now it's time to start over. Considering that I no longer have anything tying me down, I'm looking for new waters to make my own. So, give me your recommendations for great fly fishing waters, preferably in the Northwest. I will be leaving Alaska, and traveling light.
Thanks for the recommendments!
rw royalwu...@earthlink.net
That says it all. Good luck, Shawn.
"Skwala" westfork59...@hotmail.com
Montana, Wyoming, and Alberta, in that order if you have my tastes....
And, ahhhh, bummer dude.
"slenon" sle...@tampabay.rr.com
Shawn: Any territory you haven't fished before. Hope the breakup leaves you sufficient property to keep it together. Good luck!
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Stev Lenon 91B20 '68-'69 Drowning flies to Darkstar Save a cow, eat a PETA sle...@tampabay.rr.com http://web.tampabay.rr.com/stevglo/index.html/slhomepage92kword.htm
"Stan Gula" sg...@bellatlantic.net.remove.invalid
If your travels take you to New England, get in touch. I'm a newly re-born bachelor too. Life gets better.
--Stan
"Shawn Armstrong" sx...@NOSPAMMERalaska.edu
I used to live back East, upstate NY to be more precise, and think I'm gonna stick to the West for awhile. Thanks for the invite and the support though.
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Shawn Armstrong Lead Network Engineer Information Technology Services Systems Services University of Alaska Phone: (907) 474-5498 mailto:shawn.armstr...@alaska.edu PGP Key: 0x8F79F610
"Paul Goodwin" ylf_nom...@yahoo.com
Hey, It could be worse. She could have let him use your fishing gear.
Paul (who also had a trial wife)
"Bill Kiene" bki...@pacbell.net
Shawn, Somewhere between Seattle, WA and the BC/Canada border.
You might thank her some day.
Many of us have been down that highway too and survived it all.
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Bill Kiene Kiene's Fly Shop Sacramento, CA www.kiene.com ...
Frank Church boo...@peoplepc.com.invalid
Damn, must be something in the air, turns out I'm losing about 110 lbs at the end of this year...can you spell D-I-V-O-R-C-E? This'll be my 3rd one, and my last. Now maybe I can make one of those western claves.
Hoofukkinray!
Frank Church ..have red truck, will travel
Frank Church boo...@peoplepc.com.invalid
Sorry to hear that Shawn, on several levels (divorce is never fun and shit!, there goes my guide next summer!) ;-) If your driving out, swing by Calgary, AB...I've always had a soft spot in my heart for that town and location...helluva view of the mountains, a clean city and the fishing opportunities must be overwhelming. And then of course, Spokane,WA is a good spot as well, good fishing around there and you're just a stones throw from Idaho...ah, wait a minute, mebbe RW is taking in renters in his cabin... :) :) :) Frank Church ..divorce must be catching, see my post to Stan Gula :(
"Tim J." NOkpos3wtS...@comcast.net.invalid
Sorry to hear that, Frank. The up side is that you now have enough time to make a pit stop in Western M***. on your way to and from Maine. I'll show you how to use that new bamboo rod. ;-) Good luck to both youse guys.
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TL, Tim
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http://css.sbcma.com/timj
Frank Church tailing_lo...@yahoo.invalid.com
Tim, I'd be proud to have you as my instructor...whereabouts are you located? That rod is a sure thing now and it should be ready by next spring.
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Frank Church Elkhart, IN tailing_lo...@yahoo.invalid.com
"Tim J." NOkpos3wtS...@comcast.net.invalid
Elevated from newbie to instructor in one post - I like that. :) There's a gaggle (peck?) of roffians located here in the greater Springfield, MA area or within an hour or so driving time. We could make sure you get a line wet long enough to distract you and make off with your 'boo.
Rumor has it there was a one-day mini-clave on the Quaboag River at some point.
We could try and organize a repeat performance.
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TL, Tim
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http://css.sbcma.com/timj
"Jeff Taylor" foi...@hotpop.com
I am taking off today at noon for Kelly Creek and the North Fork of the Clearwater for six days. Not sure when you are leaving Alaska, however you will find some great fishing if you head in our direction.
We will be camping at either Kelly Forks or Cold Springs... Stop in and I will buy you a cold one and we can swap stories. Went through it myself about 11 years ago. In hind sight...the best thing that ever happened, at the time fairly devastating.
I have been with my wife (Dawn) 10 years and married to her for 5. She actually like to see me go on a fishing trip and have a good time and a time or three a year, she will go along and throw a fly around too.
Best of luck to you, Jeff
Frank Church tailing_lo...@yahoo.invalid.com
Well, you know what they say, "flattery will get you _______" fill in your choice. :) Well heck, you and Stan (the guy with the hat backwards and a goofy look on his face) re: Willi's roff pictures, are practically neighbors. I may have to chain that 'boo to my wrist it seems. :)
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Frank Church Elkhart, IN tailing_lo...@yahoo.invalid.com
"Paul Goodwin" ylf_nom...@yahoo.com
[snip] Divorced?
"Tim J." NOkpos3wtS...@comcast.net.invalid
Stan always has that goofy look on his face - it's not just the picture. There are five or six folks we could probable scare up around the area depending on schedules and such. One of us is sure to have a hack saw.
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TL, Tim
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http://css.sbcma.com/timj
tomnc ...@mac.com (Tom Gibson)
Coastal Oregon is pretty nice. Having lived in AK for 5 years (Homer), I can tell you that I *really* miss living near the ocean.
The fishing here in central PA is excellent but it'd be awfully nice to smell salt air (and catch saltwater fish) more than once or twice a year.
Tom G bummer, dude
William Claspy w...@NOcwruSPAM.edu
Damn, that's good to hear, 'cause it doesn't look so great from here....
Bill
"Clark Reid" clarkr...@xtra.nospam.co.nz
Sorry to hear of the life turns you guys are both dealing with. I've never been formally divorced, mainly because I've never been formally married but have been through two major long term relationships (Living in sin more than 4 years) and was devastated when each one ended so I feel for you, but, if I hadn't been through them I wouldn't have what I have now... it's all for the better down the track a bit....
Good luck to you both...
--
Clark Reid http://www.dryflynz.com Umpqua Designer Flytier
tomnc ...@mac.com (Tom Gibson)
Uh, Clark, my marriage is going great. In fact, today is my 9th anniversary. I too feel sorry for Shawn--what a shitty way for a marriage to end--and I appreciate your undeserved symapthy as well.
;-) Tom G
"Clark Reid" clarkr...@xtra.nospam.co.nz
<>...
Oops, my apologies for you, sympathy for Shawn.. :)
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Clark Reid http://www.dryflynz.com Umpqua Designer Flytier
Warren m...@privacy.net
Shawn, Sorry to hear about your misfortunes. I wish I could offer you some advice having been down that long, painful road but honestly it is going to be something that you have to figure out on your own.
I will give you some advice based upon my past experience. When I first hit that patch of black ice, there were two people here on ROFF (just cranked out Tangled Up In Blue again tonight. thanks wayno!) who really lifted my spirits out of the shitter and started me down another path. I didn't need to move, but merely change my perspective. When the shit hits the fan, I often fantasize about moving to Alaska to get away from the bullshit, but moving wouldn't change anything. Moving back to the lower 48 isn't your best bet IMO. You should think about moving farther away from you ex and having even more fun. You no longer have an anchor weighing you down and can now go out and do the things that make you happy. If moving is what you think will make you happy, then go on vacation for a few weeks and just explore those "places out west" that may bring you happiness until you find the right one.
Just remember that you hit a speed bump in life, nothing more. If you have kid(s), do all you can for them and don't run from your ex. The better the relationship you can foster with the kid(s), the better. Children aren't the responsible ones in this mess called divorce and don't forget that. My daughter is still the best thing that ever happened to me and my ex will never be able to change that fact even though she has often tried. Children are the innocent bystanders and putting more distance between you will not heal the wounds that you are now feeling. Not having your kid(s) around will only make the pain worse. Trust me, I tried.....
Reach down below, sack up and simply soldier on with a one finger salute and do what it is that you need to do in life. If moving is what it takes to make you happy, then move. If you can still find happiness where you are at, then stay. But don't run away from the problem because it will only make things worse in the long run. You very well could move to someplace that will only make you more miserable than staying and dealing with a feisty ex in a divorce battle.
Just my $.02 so take it for what it's worth.
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Warren (use troutbum_mt (at) yahoo to reply via email)
"riverman" nos...@sorry.com
Shawn: When I first read your post, I knew there was something I wanted to say to you, but I couldn't reach it. What Warren says is exactly what I wanted to express: don't leave town.
I'm someone who spends his life moving from one place to another, and although the lure of 'starting new somewhere else' seems appealing and like it will make it easier to heal over a trauma, in fact, moving is itself such a trauma that it distracts you from recovering from the other. Even when your life is fine, your marriage intact, your kids doing well in school and you feel great about yourself, the first few weeks of a move are horrendous.
It takes a long time to develop a support network of friends, and when you move, you have no one who knows who you are. You don't know where the grocery store is, if the apartment you chose was in a good part of town, who to work for, your checks are no good at the hardware store, etc. Sure, you get the chance to re-create yourself, but that takes a tremendous amount of time and energy, and the willingness of empathetic people around you. You don't get that when you roll into town reeling from a divorce; you get a lot of people staring and talking about you, or worse yet; ignoring you. And coming in from Alaska to the lower 48 is, to most flatlanders, like coming in from Mars. They won't understand you.
OTOH, consider the situation if you move to a nearby region, where your friends can still get to you, where you can still get to places that give you roots, give you time to walk and think about your choices while you are still inside your own mind, where you already know things like where the bank is, when to pay the electric bill, where to get a bottle of scotch, where to cast a line... Later, once you have gotten over the divorce enough to move on (like a year or more later...), then if you want to move and change the view, its YOU who is moving; not some hurting person looking to begin from zero, making choices when they are not in the right mind to do so.
It will certainly take time to recover from a divorce. I've never been married, but I was devistated by the ending of a 4-year relationship and if getting divorced is as bad as that (I know its even worse), then I know you will need all the support you can get. Posting to roff was certainly a request for some support from sympathetic strangers, and as much as we are all as supportive as we can be, its nothing compared to sitting right across the table from a good friend, sharing your fears and angers, and knowing that they know who you <really> are. You won't have that if you relocate.
Hang in there, and I'm glad you got ROFF to talk to! But we're not enough, as much as we want to be.
--Myron
"Wayne Harrison" wa...@triad.rr.com
(snip) i'm proud of you, bud.
yfitons wayno
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