Listening Skills
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siamiamk ...@aol.com (Siam)
Funny how the act of listening to someone is a skill. Many people like to talk. How many times do you attempt to listen to what another person is really saying?
This message board at times does feel more like talking without listening.
Maybe I am wrong. Or maybe it is the nature of this communication method. You 'speak' for an extended period of time on a discussion board vs. a normal conversation.
Are you listening? :) Cheers
"chris" ch...@veggies.org
No. But I feel you know that.
There's more than one way to 'listen' Siam. (I offer love, warmth, intimacy ...............) I used to teach listening skills (as part of a mentoring course), there were so many ways to show you were listening - eye contact, body posture, facial expression, paraphrasing, reflection, repetition, asking for clarification, nodding, empathy, rapport, warmth, the five 'w's (who, what, where, why, when) etc. etc.
Many of which do not apply in a newsgroup ...........
Possible questions to show someone you are listening (these were from Co-counselling, an offshoot of Dianetics) - You don't feel heard ? What's the thought ? How does that make you feel ? What does that remind you of ?
Can you think of an earlier time you felt like that ? Who do you want to say that to ? Do you want to repeat that ? Say that again ? What else do you need from me ? Is there anything you want to say you haven't already said ?
Any unfinished business ?
As I was saying Siam, this conversation is really all about me, not you, no-one wants to listen to you droning on about how awesome Landmark is ;-) My ~listening~ here changes in a moment from analytical to argumentative, from reflective to disclosing, from discursive to challenging, from scepticism to irony.
Chris
siamiamk ...@aol.com (Siam)
What course did you teach listening skills in? there were Very true.
Unfortunately that is true.
Lol. Good point. That may be how someone's listening is of me (uh, Ellen).
Yes, I can find my ~listening~ changing rapidly as well. Might even be affected by the mood I am in when I sit down to the computer.
Cheers
"chris" ch...@veggies.org
Introduction to Co-counselling, Mentoring Skills for Youth, and Self-Development for Men and Women, at Westminster Adult Education Services www.waes.ac.uk from 2000 to 2003.
Chris
drsmith ...@aol.com (Bass Guitar God)
Many of the people's views here are so obviously compartmentalized, that there is very little surprise value.
"chris" ch...@veggies.org
You think 'surprise value' is a virtue ?
Chris
patrick_darcy patri...@grandecom.net
u got that right
--
*LOVE* is all u need.
drsmith ...@aol.com (Bass Guitar God)
Sure. You wouldn't want to go see a movie if you'd already read the book. Or maybe you would, but the emotional impact would be much lessened due to the linear nature of the experience.
"Markus Welch" mark...@pacbell.net
So .. can it be then said that it is a "self-interested" preservation of the *experience* that is of the highest import because it retains the most *emotional impact*?
Regards, MarkusW
"chris" ch...@veggies.org
OK, now we're getting somewhere B***.
You think 'surprise value' and 'emotional impact' are good. Maybe this is not 'normal' pathology, maybe it is an addiction to things with shock stimulation value because you like the chemical high, the endorphins, the adrenaline rush. It's a sort of bi-polar disorder or mania.
This is just what Landmark relies on to attract students, what it encourages in its training, and what it produces in its ~graduates~. Landmark is a hyped-up programme for hyper people.
These bi-polar swings are one of the most dangerous outcomes of the Forum, and can lead to such severe mood swings that people take stupid risks, make crazy decisions, and basically screw up their lives, their families and their work. It encourages people to become more addicted to, and more reliant on, hype and adrenaline. Not a natural or healthy thing at all.
Chris
siamiamk ...@aol.com (Siam)
I enjoy seeing a movie after I read the book. I like to see how a director/writer portrays his vision on the screen. Also interesting to see how much material they leave out to fit everything in a 2 hour window.
Cheers Or
drsmith ...@aol.com (Bass Guitar God)
NO, old chap I think I know what you're saying and I don't mean it at all. I was just saying, like a can of campbell's soup or a big mac at mcdonalds, good or bad, you can count on some people to give you a consistant product over and over.
drsmith ...@aol.com (Bass Guitar God)
Interesting, but I think a common desire among people is to add some spice to thier life. That's why people go on vacations, BECAUSE THEY'RE NOT HOME!!
Not so sure I would do it unless I got Linda.
drsmith ...@aol.com (Bass Guitar God)
I MEANT LAUREL. Shit.
thehopeful ...@nospamhotmail.com (The Hopeful Guy)
If I ran the Forum..
Oy vey! Hast du im deinem leben? Mensch!
Best regards, The Hopeful Guy Remove nospam to reply
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