guilt
Related Topics
Baron Von Sucko ropersta...@hotmail.com
Do you ever feel guilty for not doing everything you can to minimize your condition? Sometimes I'm convinced that if I just slept the same nine hours every night and exercised half an hour three times a day and never drank caffeine or alcohol, and gave up all junk food and ate only fresh vegetables, whole grains, tofu and skim milk, and practiced my posture constantly, and never used the computer except for work, I could get better. I feel like a fraud, for stumbling by, working only a couple hours a day, when I could cure myself if I REALLY wanted to.
In more rational moments, I know I'm trying, and the life I've described isn't health, it's just another kind of disease, one that leaves no room for friends, family, or life.
"Michael Baugh" baugh...@bellsouth.net
Forget the whole grains part. Otherwise I'll tell you more than you want to know about the "Staff of Life" being slow poison for many.
Baron Von Sucko <ropersta...@hotmail.com> wrote in message ...
"Nanny" dorlc...@tds.net
Oh yeah, many are the times I've thought of these things! But, I'm inclined to agree more with your last statement. Sometimes we just have to decide what trade-offs we are willing to make. In fact, it's not unusual for many of us to decide to do something or go somewhere even though we know a flare will follow, but we do it anyhow. Why? Because life is still worth living and we refuse to let this crappy disease disable us entirely! Nanny "Baron Von Sucko" <ropersta...@hotmail.com> wrote in message ...
"Rosemarie Shiver" post...@strato.net
Hiya, If you'd do all that you'd have a healthier lifestyle and you'd STILL have 3 times the amount of Substance P in your CNS as 'normals' do.
Pain is what FM does to us, not what we bring on ourselves, OK? It wasn't anything you brought on yerself or that you can take off yerself thru diet and exercise. In fact, you could very well get a bit skinnier and hurt a LOT more.
Here's something you may not know. Many FM'ers, if they take cough medicine wi\ith guaifenesin in it, will go into flare. So choosing your coff medicine wisely is one of the better things you can do....but it's sure not a cure.
YOU didn't cause it....YOU can't cure it, OK? You can manage FM as well as you can, but a healthy lifestyle won't make you like you were before...it ain't a turn back the clock kind of thing.
Hope you can wrastle and come to terms with these FM aspects 'cuz that's whut it takes. Almost a cultural unbrainwashing thingie.
Hugs Without Guilt, Rosie S.
Demented Dame
--
"If you wanna get it done, you gotta fight for yourself." -- Meat Loaf, Bat Outta Hell II "Baron Von Sucko" <ropersta...@hotmail.com> wrote in message ...
"Jeannette" linkstolearn...@charter.net
Dang Rosie, you burst another bubble of mine!!! There is always room for hope though!! Right? Can't take that away from us.... no, no, no, can't take that away from us!!! Dang disease!!! :>)) Nettie ...
"Melissa" non...@forspammers.net
Just do what you can and know that you are doing your best! Hang in there, somedays you can do more than others..some days you just can't! Melissa "Baron Von Sucko" <ropersta...@hotmail.com> wrote in message ...
"Rosemarie Shiver" post...@strato.net
Hmmm, Nettie?
Same as RA, in a way.. You didn't do anything to bring RA down upon ya, and diet and exercise won't keep the RA at bay, but it can be treated and stopped. Not cured, you'll still be an RA'er, but the effects of RA can be lessened. We're not there yet, with FM, but of course there's hope ta be.
Maureen by the sea predicts in 5 years or less.
I'm hopin' there will be a breakthru as to why we have such high Substance P and thereby the chronic widespread pain. Dr. Starlanyl and friends may be closer with their latest looking into auxilliary systems of the central and peripheral nervous systems.
Then we can say to the neurologists: so there! Just 'cuz it was too small for you to see doesn't mean it's not there. Being blind to it doesn't mean it's non-existant. <g> Then treatments could be tailored to the differing microbiologic systems involved...not all FM'ers are the same or will respond to the same kind of treatments, just as all RA'ers aren't given just one kind of biologic drug. :-) Playing catch-up to you Rheumatoid ppl....emphasizing tho', that one cannot make RA or FM go away and disappear forever. It don't work that way.
You knew that, right?
'Splainin' Hugs, Rosie S.
Demented Dame
--
"If you wanna get it done, you gotta fight for yourself." -- Meat Loaf, Bat Outta Hell II ...
"Jeannette" linkstolearn...@charter.net
Yes yes, I know and knew that. I am one of the more fortunate RAers. I responded well to MTX early in the game and it has remained pretty much under control for years now. Tery was not so lucky. Her body would not respond to any of the drugs nor trial drugs. Within weeks of her retirement at age 40+ -, she died. It broke my heart. Her family did not deserve to lose her.... she had a beautiful soul. She also had fibro.... God bless her heart. In her honor, we forge ahead with hope in our hearts. I sure do miss her.
Nettie :>(( ...
"Cindy" cmath...@cox.net
Kind of like after slowing down, and not doing all that you use to, maybe you have better days than when you were trying to do it all.you start to feel like, well maybe I am just kidding myself. I am not that sick....But then you go out and do to much, or have a little more stress this week than last, or you just wake up that day. The mack truck has been by to see you, and it is all you can do to get out of bed...So I understand the guilt thing. And coming to terms with what our lives are now.Does this make any sense?
Well it is bed time...
Cindy "Baron Von Sucko" <ropersta...@hotmail.com> wrote in message ...
"Allison Rae Cowhig" acow...@nospamtampabay.rr.com
I think most people feel this way in their lives. I feel incredibly guilty.
I am only 26 and I act and feel like I am 80 sometimes. I try to say This too shall p***. Sometimes it helps, and sometimes it pisses me off even more. Its good to feel sorry for yourself sometimes. Throw a pity party!!
But don't let guilt or this stupid illness get the better of you.
We are not defined by FM or any other illness. Illnesses might change us into something different, but at the core we are the same. Ramble Ramble......... : ) Allison "Baron Von Sucko" <ropersta...@hotmail.com> wrote in message ...
cha ...@ix.netcom.com (Cristi)
On Mon, 28 Apr 2003 00:57:17 GMT, Baron Von Sucko I have noticed that doctors do this to us. Constantly. For instance, back when I was on Prozac and getting fat, my doctor was trying to control my blood pressure. She pointed out that it was all my fault because of my weight, and showed me a graph that showed that as my weight changed, my blood pressure changed correspondingly. So I took on that guilt. Years later, I am at my correct weight, and my blood pressure is still out of control. Now I know that Prozac was making me fat--though she insisted it made people skinny. As far as all the things you could do to cure yourself, I can only offer you this perspective: people with FMS have been trying them for decades. I feel like I've tried nearly everything myself. Nothing works, or we'd be heaing about the new miracle-cure for FMS. Cristi
cha ...@ix.netcom.com (Cristi)
There are two other factors that add to our guilt. One, most of us go through a pre-diagnostic period of being told that it's all in our heads--especially if our illness began in the 80's or before. And even once we're diagnosed, we encounter doctors who don't "believe in" FMS. And lay-people who have decided we'd be just fine if we did like them, and <...> (insert favorite gimmic or hobby).
Second, since no one knows what causes FMS or how to fix it, everybody is guessing. Herbalists, chiropractors, acupunturists, naturopaths, and medical doctors, they're all out there guessing like crazy. Even the studies that you can find on-line are mostly poorly done. Why, I've seen guesswork even in the medical journals. It's symptomatic of a mystery disease. If you had MS, no one would dare suggest these various things. It would seem like an insult. On the other hand, before doctors figured out what caused MS, people who had it were subjected to the same whole long line of idiocy.
Certainly you'd feel better if you did all the things you mentioned.
Any normal person would. But cure or even improve your fibro? I sure do doubt it...
Cristi
"Jeannette" linkstolearn...@charter.net
You are right with drs. trying to make you feel guilty. Exercise, exercise..... dang, try and exercise when your body is hurting all over.
Same with weight..... well, for me I have a 9 month pregnancy size tummy that is hard as a rock. It is not fat.... damn it.... nothing will get rid of it. I have an enlarged liver and that is why it sticks out. I know fat from a hard stomach. Finally my new GP said he is NOT concerned about my weight but my overall health condition and getting that up to maximum level for me. What a guy!!!
Nettie ...
cha ...@ix.netcom.com (Cristi)
On Mon, 28 Apr 2003 09:40:34 -0500, "Jeannette" Sounds like you got a good doctor, Nettie...
Cristi
"Jeannette" linkstolearn...@charter.net
He is good and he believes me. So does my Rhemmie, surgeon, oncologist, dermatologist, gastro dr., pulmonologist and the rest of the team. Yes, I have a team of drs amazing as it is. I have so many health issues I have a team. Whoda thunk 10 yrs. ago I would end up like this. Even mom and dad had to come to terms with their daughter being so sick; almost as sick as them. After my cancer, they became believers. My brother is still questionable..... my friends are great and my husband and the kids are fantastic. I am very lucky.
Nettie ...
"Ren?©" morning-gl...@earthlink.net
What!!?? No! I have enough stuff that I really *am* guilty of, and I already feel like shit about those things! Why would I want to feel guilty about something that isn't my fault, that I had no way of preventing, and that I'm doing all I can to deal with!?
Look here, Baron -- save the guilt trips for things that you had a choice over -- not this FMS crap. Don't waste your energy on it. You're a good person, and you didn't wake up suddenly one morning and say to yourself, "Well I'm gonna get this horrible invisible illness and everyone will think I'm lazy and crazy, and I deserve it because I'm so bad." No you did not!
Neither you nor anyone else deserves this. It's not a punishment.
And if anyone around you is trying to tell you that you could have prevented it tell them to take a flying leap!
-- Ren?©
"Jeannette" linkstolearn...@charter.net
Yes Gidget.... my stomach is very hard.... no fat. They tell me it is caused by an enlarged and fatty infiltrated liver and there is like a sack of fluid surrounding it. I absolutely hate it!! My clothes do not fit right. I am much smaller from the waist down. It is hard to find dresses to fit right. I am looking at dresses for Jenny's wedding next April and it is totally frustrating. I need a particular style to not exsentuate my belly but a full skirt so I can dance. I am buying a long one since I am a mom. I have found a couple of them in catalogs which I sent for so I will see how they will look. We are past the less than one year mark so it is getting exciting. She is also graduating from college on Saturday. We will be up in your area but no time. On Sunday we have to move her back home.
Urgh!!!
Nettie ...
"Okasan" nos...@earthlink.net
You know.... I use to, because I can't do the normal things a mom usually can do with a three boys at 3, 9 and 11 can do. But I think that no matter WHAT the others say, it is NOT AIYH and the neurological system is WHACKED and doing all the dietary goodies and excercise will not keep the pain, aches and fatigue from coming. I believe that because I've tried it for almost a year or so and nothing was different... so I went back to being a junk food junkie, caffiene addict, and web surfer w/out the extra guilt.
Hey, that's all we need is another thing weighing us down x-) Judy "Baron Von Sucko" <ropersta...@hotmail.com> wrote in message ...
Baron Von Sucko ropersta...@hotmail.com
Thank you, everybody. I've come to a conclusion--every month, I will try one new thing--something I can do for minimal money, that won't require an absurd amount of effort, that seems reasonably likely to improve my health in some way. April--cheap tai chi cl*** at the community center. I like it, think I'll stick with it. May I'll make taking B vitamins. Just one change per month. If it seems to help, I'll stick with it. If not, I'll stop. Either way, I'll try to introduce a new change the next month. As long as I try one thing per month, I'm doing enough.
"Jeannette" linkstolearn...@charter.net
Sounds like a plan..... just don't over do it ok?
Nettie "Baron Von Sucko" <ropersta...@hotmail.com> wrote in message ...
"Kathy Gallagher" katg...@voyager.net
Would a 2 pc outfit work better? Different top and bottom and easier to fit. Should look like one pc when you get it on.
KG ...
Deirdre deir...@netidea.com
That was pretty darned fast.
Your doctor may have been very near omniscient. I'm totally impressed.
It's listed under rare effects ***ociated with generalized and localized edema - face, tongue etc. Possibly the rep told your doctor because Prozac is more commonly ***ociated with weight LOSS. And that side effect is sometimes dangerous.
I found some good information that might be of interest here: http://www.mentalhealth.com/drug/p30-p05.html I'd still like to know how your doctor knew.
Since weight gain on Prozac may be water retention - the article certainly suggests that - you might have benefitted from counselling that would have sent you in the direction of a low carb high protein diet.
Oh dear. Well, maybe the standard approaches to weight loss wouldn't be suited to your needs. It's worth a thought or two or three. ???
Deirdre
--
<???{{{><???{{{><???{{{><???{{{><???{{{><???{{{><???{{{><???{{{><???{{{><???{{{><???{{{><???{{{><???{
| To Top |